


Play Pretend

by astronauts_but_with_wings



Category: Wander Over Yonder
Genre: M/M, many watchdogs
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-04-21
Updated: 2016-05-31
Packaged: 2018-06-03 14:39:37
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 8
Words: 20,796
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6614560
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/astronauts_but_with_wings/pseuds/astronauts_but_with_wings
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Commander Peepers wants to get rid of Wander in order for Lord Hater to not get distracted from conquering the universe. So he devices a plan to become the wandering weirdo's 'friend'.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

Conquering the universe would be so, so easy if it weren’t for the fact that the very guy you work for was an idiot. I mean, credits where credits due, he is a force to be reckoned with. Powerful wrath that shots deadly fierce lightning with a presence that only exudes destruction and mayhem would follow its wake if you do not surrender to his will. All of this dangerous ferocity was perfect for Peepers plans! If not for one minor little inconvenience…

Wander

The little wandering weirdo would show up, do something obnoxious (leading example: singing, dancing, playing games and somehow all of that at once) to completely foil his plans! All of this could have easily been ignored if it weren’t for the fact that Lord Hater, big mean brute at the forefront of all his plans for ruling the universe, was so obsess in taking this furry menace down. It was maddening. Every planet they try or even plan to conquer fails because of a happy go lucky hairy spoon and his zbornak sidekick.

To be fair, at least the zbornak is a much more viable threat who runs through his watchdog army like they were nothing. But no, his Lord had to be fixated with the hyperactive nuisance known as the friendliest hobo in the entire universe…

Wander

Peepers was going to have to think up of a plan to get rid of the insufferable fool one way or another but ultimately leave the finishing blow up to Lord Hater, finally ridding his nemesis once and for all and for Commander Peepers to get his plans working again. But how?

Commander Peepers was deep in thought, seated in the food court for lunch on a separate table away from other watchdogs. He picked at his food too concentrated on his thoughts to start eating. What was Wander’s weakness aside from being a compulsive helper? How can he get to him without getting his one (and only one) good eye punched all the way to the next moon by the zbornak? He was so deep in thought that he only just realized the alarms went off inside the ship. Standing abruptly, he shouted at the watchdogs that were dumbly just standing there while the alarm was still off. He yelled at them to capture the intruders that broke in.

He knew it was them, he can hear that annoying banjo playing not that far away. What was their deal? What now??

 

Commander Peepers rushed in blaster ready to the direction of the noise and was greeted by utter chaos. Lord Hater was already there absolutely fuming joined with a few watchdogs engrossed in a game while the rest of the army that was there cheered at the sides. And in that game was the troublemaker himself…

Wander

 

The commander had no idea what they were playing. Wander was there playing his banjo and singing something, something probably happy or joyful or whatever he could care less. Stopping and playing and stopping and playing and playing over and over again. Every time he stopped they stopped dancing and every time he started they resumed with his Lord right there. Lord Hater the greatest in the galaxy, reduced to playing games just to outdo the walking spoon.

Peepers heaved a heavy sigh and found Sylvia right next to him doing the same. She looked down at him giving a smirk almost daring him to stop this madness but in turn if he did just that he would be subject to either the zbornak punching him in the face or Hater’s lightning bolts for disrupting the game that he was ~~losing~~ winning at. He settled with putting away his blaster and crossing his arms. Best not to anger anyone especially the over protective zbornak with a good left hook.

 

Okay Peepers, stop for a sec, calm down, don’t freak out and take assessment of the situation.

“Zbornak…”

“Pipsqueak…”

Pleasantries were a good starter to not get smacked at. Good.

 

“So…” He looked back at the impromptu party that had somehow started as they were playing another game. Peepers let out another sigh. “What exactly is going on here?” His voice was as calm as the situation and years of training would allow.

“Honestly shorty, I dunno.” The thing about Sylvia was that she was frank and had common sense; the type of person Peepers can have a civil talk with if y’know they weren’t fighting.

“Why are you and the-“careful Peepers, you don’t want to get pummelled to the ground now, do you? “ttthhheee uh your friend... doing here?”

Sylvia was scowling but otherwise let the slip up pass.

“Wander wants to be friends with the guy and suddenly thought that playing games and junk would help the bitter bag of bones lighten up a bit. Saw the ship nearby and ran there without me and I had to follow him. But honestly, Wander would do crazy things if it means having to do good on someone.”

Doing crazy things to make a friend…

Huh

That could work

 

The party abruptly ended after Lord Hater had lost yet another game for the twenty seventh time in a row and had blasted everyone in shocking distance to leave him be. Wander and Sylvia were long gone before the violent outburst or so he thought.

Wander was still in the ship walking around as if he wasn’t on a planet conquering battleship filled with watchdogs who wanted to capture you or at least they would if they all weren’t tired or in the infirmary or just not trying. Sylvia must have fled the other way and was most likely trying to find him. But until then…

 

Wander had wandered around a hall that didn’t have any other watchdogs and Peepers knows there wouldn’t be any body monitoring from the cameras because Andy (the watchdog who does the show about the Skullship. Dumb show) was also in the infirmary for trying to get a scoop from the other watchdogs who actually won a few games. Commander Peepers had been following Wander for this exact moment to act out his plan. A very simple yet very difficult to execute plan…

 

Play Pretend with Your Bosses Enemy just to Backstab Him

 

Stupid plan name but desperate times calls for desperate measures! Now there’s just one problem… How do you go about making friends?

 

Peepers walked up to Wander and the Star Nomad took notice. Before he could get a word out to probably improvise a friendship acceptance speech, it probably wouldn’t be too hard to convince the fool, Wander had beaten him to it.

 

“Mister Peepers, Hello!” He was smiling as bright as a star about to go super nova. Hooo boy, Peepers, what have you gotten yourself into? “Anythin’ I could do for ya? Did Hater enjoy the games? I’m sure a whole bunch of you guys did. I saw Jacob, Oliver, Barry, Mason, Garry…” Wander went on and on and Peepers was seriously reconsidering this plan.

Just hold on for a little bit. Make it believable- come on, you’re a commander for pete's sake! Second in command er third but that hardly really matters when he was in charge!

 

“Haha yes!” quickly cutting in on Wander’s list of watchdogs that attended during the games. “ that they did!”

“Did you want to be part of the games? Sorry, it got ended so soon. I’m sure Hater must have felt tired after attending all of em! Man, did you see how good he was at the last one? Sure was a shame he didn’t win any but what counts is the fun you had with friends!”

“Oh, I'm sure.” throwing in a smile for good measure. He can do this, this was easy. Just idle back and forth no need to jump right into battle without knowing the enemy first.

“So Mister Peepers, have you seen Syl ‘round here? I’ve been going around greetin’ everyone and still no sign of her…”

Peepers was making a mental note to scolding everyone around the last few halls Wander passed through but first…

“What’s the rush? I’m sure a few minutes of respite from all your travelling wouldn’t hurt right?”

 

So that’s how Commander Peepers found himself back at the food court with the wandering weirdo, both with sandwiches eating together on the table, listening to him recount his countless travels. Listening in and out and nodding every so often to make it believable. No one else was here in the food court so Peepers had no problem with taking his plans here.

“Have you ever been to Ophus?”

“Ah yes, the planet best known for its volcanoes and their strong defences. A fortress entirely made out of a red hard material only common to that planet alone. Weak military, too reliant on their buildings…”

“Yeah, but have you been in it?”

“No. Why?”

“They have the best hot springs! There are towns inside towns underground with more towns and in there is the most heavenly hot springs I’ve ever been to. I mean Ballzeria 9 who by the way migrated on Buster had great service but they were no Ophus hot spring! You should really try visitin’ someday.”

 

Peepers didn’t even know about the underground towns. Were they more vulnerable there? With a military group too cocky on their outside defences would never consider an inside attack. Probably have to get to the Ruler through spies and conquer it from the inside thus not damaging the fortress walls for future invaders to take advantage of. They could retain their power over them along with a strong fortress.

 

Wander continued. “…The folks there are great! Although a little skittish of the outside word. They have this stories that thought them monsters are on top of the surface. Poor fellas… Good thing Sylvia and I taught them that the universe wasn’t all that bad! Then I got some into star gazing and outdoor picnics! It was great!”

Not for long though…

 

“There was this lil kid that had dreams of travelling out one day but always got shot down by their folks but after our visit there, they were willin’ on giving the kid a chance! Now she wants to travel waaaayy out there! The universe too! But she wasn’t all that old enough for space travelin’ so we had to tell her later. Her parents still fear the outside and stuff, same goes for most adults ‘round there…”

“And if they end up not letting her go?”

“Well, oh well… parents are like that but when a child dreams for bigger brighter things like stars and galaxies! You gotta let her go at one point!”

 

Wander sounded so sure of himself, filled with hope his eyes literally sparkled. It made the commander’s stomach churn.

 

Another voice yelled from across the court.

“Wander! There you are. I’ve been looking all over for-“ Sylvia eyed Hater’s commander suspiciously for a second before looking back at her best friend. “… you.”

Then she glanced back at Peepers to shot a glare.

“Small fry…”

“Zbornak…”

“Hiya Syl!”

 

Time to make his escape

“Well, it was nice talking to you. I’ll be leaving to do very important highly confidential work now. Exit’s down the corner to the right and it isn’t a missile launcher to a wall!” pointing an accusatory finger at Sylvia before straightening himself and preparing to leave the perplexed zbornak and the waving spoon.

“Bye Mister Peepers! We’ll be seein’ ya!”

“Goodbye Wander.”

 

Waving without looking at them, he left to actually do his work.

 

It was early the next morning, Peepers was reviewing plans for an updated laser and thought deeply if it was really a sound investment to upgrade it when the weapon had combusted several times in the past. Probably not… Lord Hater walked into the meeting room late as usual looking like he would much rather beat up the chair than sit on it. He sat on it any way.

 

“Good morning sir. How’s your back?” remembering the fiasco yesterday, most likely not good.

 

Hater grumbled something like the promise of murder but didn’t voice it out loud, most likely still bitter from losing over children’s games. Peepers went back to his papers and found a pitch to conquer Ophus using several lasers all at once on a weaken area. Needs to be redone since he knows that wouldn’t be very profitable because of a conversation he had with a certain wanderer…

Peepers slipped that plan to the bottom of his work before starting the meeting.

 

He made no mention about the planet nor its hot springs and towns and underground towns during the entire meeting. It was a stupid planet anyway…

 


	2. Chapter 2

To say that Commander Peepers was having a rough day was an understatement, it was hell.

His morning started with the classic butter side down half burnt to death piece of toast on the floor. After the demoralizing stare down Peepers had with his former breakfast, he decided to just have a cup of coffee. The coffee landed on the floor shortly after when a watchdog ran past him in blind panic. Not knowing for what reason, he followed the sounds of screaming. The meeting room was on fire. It was literally lit in flames and everyone was running around in utter chaos. Hater wasn’t up yet and he needed to get breakfast for him. Put out the fire or face the wrath of a spoiled skeletal overlord with horrible temper tantrums…

Preparing food like a peasant it is then.

Lunch break was interrupted when Emperor Awe-you flarging kidding me??!? had crashed his stupid party limo right in their food court. The place now has a giant hole that would have to cut all of their salary to fix because Awesome had fled from the scene before anyone could apprehend him. Peepers had spent the entire afternoon running around managing the repairs, scolding the workers from slacking off, managing the ships maintenance, scolding the maintenance team for a sloppy job, more running, preparing blueprints, more running, more scolding, and getting scolded at by a furious Lord Hater cause apparently no one told him there was a gaping hole in the ship caused by Awesome while he was in his room listening to loud music. Work, work, work, all the way till midnight and morning was a death trap waiting for him in just a few hours, ready to piss at his face once again.

Commander Peepers was stressed, tired, hungry and equal parts furious and done before morning. He was still neck deep in paper work because knee deep was too much to ask for. It can’t get any worse than this, right?

There was a knock at his door. He didn’t have enough energy to get it. His door was probably open anyway so whoever was there can kiss his dead sleep deprived state because he sure as hell was not going to entertain an idiot watchdog or an enraged Hater, he was dead, gone, knocked out cold ignoring the strangely soft knocks. Sleep over came the commander like welcoming arms and oddly enough it was warm.

 

Peepers woke up with a blanket over him. There was no way anyone in the entire Skullship was mindful of his well being and whoever it was must be a saint. Peepers could have shrugged it off and thought nothing more of it when he realized the blanket was covered in stars.

 

He was late for the meeting and he was too tired from yesterday’s events to care. There was no meeting because there was no meeting room, and it was still getting repaired from the fire yesterday so the commander went to get breakfast when he remembered that the food court was also destroyed.

Might as well prepare for the invasion in a few minutes…

 

They landed on another planet to conquer. It was pretty standard and fairly easy invasion just attack and conquer. A few yelling here a bunch of threats there and the planet was theirs. Except that Lord Hater was yet again distracted by the-… Wander- by Wander, Peepers was too tired to think of an insult right now.

 

Hater stormed off, zapping to no avail as he missed every single time.

 

“Sir!”

Didn’t hear him

“SIR!”

Nope, still nothing

“SIIIIRRR!!!”

 

Sylvia was already beating up the front line of watchdogs left and right. Wander blissfully jumping around and dancing circles around Lord Hater and at some point made the Lord so pent up with rage, he stormed back in the ship.

Peepers was too tired to deal with this. He called back his troops for retreat; he was not dealing with this.

 

The town was cheering as they were saved by Wander and Sylvia, as usual…

 

Back in the ship, Peepers just straight up went back to his room, ignoring any and all work for when he can muster up enough energy later. He was so ready to sleep the entire day away. Hopefully Lord Hater will take his defeat today and be too bitter to bother anyone and sulk alone in his room or something. Peepers would have to see Hater later to make sure his Lord was alright. Being a commander he has to check that everything is running smoothly especially his… friend? Maybe they were and deep down he really did wish they were but right now he needed rest.

In his room was a picnic box. No way… How in the name of glorn could Wander sneak in the Skullship twice without getting cau- actually he could, he could along with making as much noise as several canons going off.

That was some talent; Peepers had to admit, for an idiot…

An idiot who brought you a picnic box filled with fruits. It’s as good enough as any at this point.

 

The fruits were so sweet it made the commander grimace.

 

A knock at his door that was oddly familiar for the way it was gentle and not demanding, Peepers can probably handle this. The fruits, albeit sickeningly sweet, were actually rejuvenating. He was still exhausted but maybe he can still pull off his strict professional presence he worked so hard to perfect in front of others.

 

“Wwhhhaaaattt…” Peepers whined. That came out a lot weaker than how he had wanted it.

Who was at the door was what made the commander jump in shock, all fatigue completely forgotten at that moment.

Wander

 

What?

WHAT?! What was that fool doing just standing there?!!!

 

Peepers quickly pulled Wander in his room by the scruff of his neck, practically throwing him in. If anyone saw him- by the commander’s door no less- there was going to be trouble, huge trouble with an angry skeletal overlord raging all around. And who has to sort out all of their troubles in the Skullship? That’s right, Commander Peepers. And Commander Peepers was not going to do that when he could be resting right now.

 

“Howdy, Mister Peepers! It’s nice ta-“

“WOULD YOU SHU-“

PLAN! PEEPERS! You had a plan to befriend him remember??

 

“Uuuuhh… come and sit with me?”

“Why thank you!”

 

Then Wander seated himself on his bed because the only chair in the room was currently lost under all the paper work Peepers promised himself he’ll do later. Okay. This was fine. Just don’t get your blaster and blast his face off. Peepers sat on the bed as well.

 

Wander clearly had something to say to him if he came all this way without his zbornak companion… or did he?

 

“Is Sylvia waiting out the door?” That’s terrifying actually.

“Oh, Syl’s in the bathroom and she takes a real long time in there like that time I brought picnic to a planetary conjunction-

“Why are you here?” Probably not that friendly to ask but he was tired and as much as he ‘loves’ this mind numbing conversations he had with the wanderer, he needed to sleep.

“Sorry about that, sometimes I get a lil sidetracked. Y’know me! Always runnin’ my mouth about this an’ that”

“Yeah. I do…” A lot actually

“And that’s exactly why I’m here!”

“Huh?”

“So I was doing a bit of thinking from our last conversation…”

“Uh huh…”

“And I just realized somethin’!”

“And… that is…?”

“We barely talk at all!”

 

Huh. That was true. Most of the conversations the wanderer did were with everyone else, even other watchdogs behind his back. They never actually had talked for more than a few minutes before and in those few minutes were Wander actually tried to get a conversation going with him, Peepers was threatening him with a blaster pointed at his face.

 

“So I thought we should talk more! Like about you. I don’t know anythin’ about you, Mister Peepers, and neither any of the other watchdogs. I mean, everyone calls you a-sorry I had to say this- ‘mean grouch’ and I didn’t think it was a nice thing to say-“

“Wander.”

“Yeah?”

“I’m tired.”

 

Peepers could just barely keep his eye open right now and Wander took notice and had a look of genuine horror. An expression Peepers would have enjoyed in a different situation, one which involves the commander towering over him in victory.

 

“OH GOSH! Mister Peepers I’m so so sorry!!”

Wander got off the bed and picked him up.

“WA-WANDER PUT ME DOW-“

And then gently laid him in bed and even tucked him in…

Wander took off his helmet and placed it by a bed post. And in a whisper as soft and caring a person like Wander can only give.

“Sweet dreams and I hope you have a great day tomorrow…”

Commander Peepers didn’t even resist the kiss Wander gave him on the top of his head.

 Before Wander can even leave the side of his bed, Peepers grabbed his arm stopping him.

 

“… Thanks for… Whatever, you already know why…”

“Aw shucks! It was nothin’. Say, when’s the next time we can have a chat like this?”

Never

“… Nnnext week?… I-“ yawns “Mmmaybee at some… place…”

“GASP! We should go to Lamouria!! whoops!” then in a quieter voice “Let’s go to Lamouria and order food an’ talk about whatever! It’s gonna be great I just know it!”

“… mmhhmm…”

“Here” Wander wrote on a sticky note he got from his hat and stuck it on Commander Peepers helmet. “Here’s so that you’ll remember.”

“…”

“Good night Mister Peepers.” And with that, Wander turned the lights off and left his room.

 

The next morning, Peepers woke up feeling better. Not at his top form but better.

 

He was walking down the hallway about to go to the food court to check on the progress when he felt several eyes on him. That’s normal in a ship filled with walking eyeballs and he was the commander after all but this was more than usual.

He heard some snickering in a hall he had just passed by and was about to tell them off when he realized they were holding back laughter and pointing at him. This was… slightly concerning and made the commander actually uncomfortable. One brave soul who probably had a death wish moved forward to ask him, trying and failing to keep his giggling fit from breaking out.

“Soooo Sir, wh-who’s the l-lucky lady?!” Then broke off in hysterics

what?

 

They were pointing at his helmet and the commander reached up and grabbed the sticky note that was stuck there.

-Meet me at that fancy restaurant in Lamouria next week at 7!! Hugs and Kisses xoxoxox <3 See ya there!!

 

Commander Peepers froze and the snickering around the hallway broke out in loud uproars of laughter.

Murder. Commander Peepers was going to murder absolutely everyone in the vicinity even if he had to dispose of all of the bodies himself…

 

What were his men thinking just laughing it out and treating their commander like this?! This wasn’t acceptable! They should fear him, just as much as they fear Lord Hater. What? What do they all actually think of him anyway? Then Peepers remembered his last conversation with Wander.

A mean grouch, that’s all? That was it?? A commander they were supposed to respect and follow only thought of him at a bare minimal, reduced to just that!? Someone who they can make fun of if they could possibly get away with it? Comments and scrutiny never got under Peepers skin before but this was something else. And apparently everyone in the Skullship would rather lend Wander a little leeway to escape then to give their actual commander respect.

The hall was quiet when they didn’t hear the all too familiar violent verbal outburst the commander was so well known for and was rightfully terrified at that moment.

Peepers, when was the last time your men actually thought you were one of them? You wanted to be different from these fools, you wanted to be above them. But when was the last time anyone thought of you as more than how Wander had oh so eloquently put it last time.

A mean grouch

 

Another watchdog, cautious and nervous, stepped forward trembling this time-most of them were. Patrick maybe or was it Kurt? Does he even know most of them anymore?

“uuhhh… sir?” No, wait that was Marty... He spilled his coffee last time.

“… How…”

Everyone was listening to him now with their at most attention. A trait a watchdog has was a good and loyal follower. Commander Peepers needed that to not only to succeed his evil plans but… He needed them to be loyal to him.

Peepers sucked in a breath and collectively everyone was also holding theirs.

 

“How does one…” a sigh “g-go about taking someone out on a date?”

 

All of the watchdogs were shocked. Then everyone laughed and laughed and it wasn’t mean spirited or to devalue him. It was warm. Something he hasn’t felt from his own kind in a very long time.

 

Then another, who was Michael if he remembered right, placed a companionable arm around him that at any other day would have the commander thrown the offending touch across the room but this made him feel… something.

 

“Don’t worry sir! We got you covered. Wink!”

…yes, he really did voice out that wink…

 

Aaaaaaannd the magic’s gone.

 


	3. Chapter 3

Commander Peepers had made a grave mistake.

In the few hours of finally showing a vulnerable side of himself to his men they had personally made it their mission to see to it that they would help their commander anyway they can. Good and loyal indeed, they were all complete hapless fools.

 

He had told them it wasn’t a ‘date’ date; it was a friendly appointment for two individuals who barely knew each other to get better acquainted that was labelled as a date. And they were all very obvious in their sarcasm when they said ‘yyyeeeeaaahhh ssuureee it iiissss’ winks all around. Peepers had to use all of his will power to not shoot them all.

One of them gave him a book full of cheesy pick up lines that were bordering on absolute stupidity and existential reality altering revelations that the commander had to sit down in contemplative silence for a solid fifteen minutes.

Andy came up to him with a mic for his show ‘Eye on The Skullship’, asking things like “How did you two meet?” “What is she like?” “There was a bunch of fan speculation about the actual gender of your date and I would like to inquire the truth, sir.” Peepers had to run out as fast as he could if he wanted to keep himself from blowing up.

At some point in the day they pulled him out of his work to present a musical consisting of ten watchdogs all in very choreographed, well practiced performance to teach him the ‘ways of love and dating’. Another of approximately thirty did the stage backgrounds and managed the props and lights. And the rest were doing the orchestra sized music. When in glorn's name did they find the time to actually organize this? He had to admit though, it was pretty impressive. And as much as the commander’s inept way of treating anyone nicely was barely acceptable, he gave them passable compliments. And by passable, he meant they took it like it meant the world to them.

Fools…

 

All Peepers had to do was to befriend Wander so that he can leave them alone. He didn’t need… whatever this was that was going on right now. It was more than just distracting him from work it was annoying in a warm fuzzy way for the fact that in the longest time they finally acknowledge him as their superior. Was superior the right word? It almost seems as if they wanted him to be their friend.

Commander Peepers scoffed. He didn’t need this, not entirely. It left something inside the commander that almost feels like a knife softly jabbed in, he doesn’t quite know how to handle it.

 

It wasn’t just on the first day that they kept bothering him; it went on to the next day and the next… The Skullship felt united almost or was it always like this but the commander was oblivious to it or too busy with conquering planets under the constant stress of Lord Hater.

The watchdogs around the food court wanted him to sit on their tables to either congratulate him for not being a total stick in the mud and getting himself a ‘date’ (again with the grop awful winking) or to genuinely want to talk to him. Peepers hadn’t really seen the appeal at the time for this much sharing until they started gossiping and he was embarrassed to admit that he was more than a little interested about whatever dirty secrets some of them held.

Every time he passed a hallway or expected a room, the watchdogs around the vicinity would all wave at him, greeted and saluted. It was kind of refreshing from the groans and eye rolls that the commander had to shout and scream for them to correct. Peepers started waving back and sometimes entertained small talk and because of Wander, he was able to keep a short but good conversation going.

Because of Wander…

Peepers doesn’t know how he feels about that either.

 

Another meeting for an invasion and Lord Hater was in one of his fouler moods, probably Emperor Awesome or some other villain that pissed on him on the net. Commander Peepers was admittedly nervous. In the last five days the mood of the entire Skullship lifted up to be a more hospitable place and it was all because the commander gave them a little semblance of humility- all because of Wander. His Lord was going to kill him if he ever finds out.

“And here are the latest updates to the weaponry…” Peepers pointed at his projector with enthusiasm as he divulges his favorite part of any meeting, talking about his plans and tech.

Rather than all of the watchdogs around the table blankly staring at him, they were listening. The commander was surprised at the same time not at all because he knows they knew from a sharing session they had over lunch break yesterday (it had become a thing), that he was a tech nerd and they let him go on and on without interrupting him once. Being supportive to their commander in their own ways. It was nice. One problem though, Lord Hater was bored.

 

“BOOORRINNGGG!!”

Peepers twitched

“SIR! This is a serious development and advantage to the project as well as a means to conquering-“

“But where is the evil part!? THE PART THAT SCREAMS LORD HATER, GREATEST IN THE GALAXY!! Peepers, I want something BIGGER BADDER-”

“B-but IT IS LOOK-“

“PEEPERS ARE YOU TELLING ME WHAT TO DO?!”

Commander Peepers was so ready to snap again when he caught a watchdog at the corner of his eye gesturing him to cut it out or to calm down. Assessing the situation again Peepers saw that Lord Hater was more than just agitated he was about ready to shoot him with lightning bolts. The air around him cackled with green static. Whoever pissed him off earlier still had the Lord furious and in need of letting it out as violently as possible. Peepers gulped.

There was no escape and Peepers was the locked on target for Hater’s wrath…

Then a watchdog piped up

“uh… Lord Hater, sir?”

“WHAT!!?”

“It’s um… l-lunch break, sir!”

And as if a switch was flipped the Lord instantly calmed down with the thought of ending the meeting because it was ‘lunch break’ it wasn’t lunch break for at least two more hours but the commander was not messing up his chances at survival just to correct him.

“Very well, meeting dismissed or whatever bluh bluh. Peepers! I expect better next time! Hater OUT!!”

Then he stormed out of the meeting room.

 

Peepers slumped down heart beating a mile a minute and twitched when he felt a hand was patting him consolingly at his back. All the other watchdogs in the room gathered around him but gave him enough space to breath. One of them put out a hand for him to take and he would have slapped it. If this was before when he thought of all of them as incompetent idiots, all beneath him, he would have slapped the hand away from him. He didn’t need their help… But Peepers needed this.

Commander Peepers accepted the hand and was helped up. Everyone in the room checking on him if he was okay and the commander now wearing off the fear he had earlier to take in something else entirely.

“…”

Come on, Commander Peepers you’ve practiced this.

“T-thanks Frank…”

The entire room was lit with joy and adoration that even Commander Peepers himself, felt like smiling. He also felt like burning and dying and crumbling up in a ball but otherwise it was okay.

“Dude, you almost died!”

“Heh… yeah... He wouldn’t though…”

“I thought you were a goner!”

“Me too…”

“Is it really lunch break sir?”

“… Y’know what? Yes. Let’s get out of here.”

 

And they all went out to get lunch together and Peepers feels the dread in the pit of his stomach with a little bit of something warmer growing inside.

 

In the food court, the tables weren’t arranged the way they were supposed to and it was like this for several days since Peepers started opening up to them. It was strategically disorganized, fit in such a way that they would all get to sit as closely together as possible to listen to each other’s stories about anything really. Understandable, if one opens up the others follow suit. And that is why the tables had been shoved and pulled together for sessions of sharing time between other watchdogs. Sometimes they were in a big group or branched off to smaller groups that Commander Peepers himself helped organised to keep them from having chaos.

Lord Hater doesn’t inspect each and every facility they had in the Skullship (Peepers did) so it wouldn’t matter if they did these sessions. As long as no one tells on them, they can keep this as long as they can. And just in case, Peepers had several back up plans to make sure Hater knows nothing of their little (huge actually) get-togethers.

 

Commander Peepers can already guess what the topic of the day was going to be…

“Hey guys, guess who nearly died today!” Jake said pulling Peepers in front of himself “This guy!!”

Yup, he called it.

There was a collective gasp and then everyone in the food court huddled together to listen to what he had to say. If Peepers wanted it, he could tell someone else from the meeting to recount the story but it might actually be good- therapeutic actually- to open up today after what had happened. Besides, his stories were always short and he limited himself to just answering questions and when he felt he was done would excuse himself to let someone else have a go. But today he felt like screaming.

“ –AND IF THAT WASN’T ENOUGH HE TOLD ME TO DO BETTER! BETTER!? IVE BEEN DOING ALL HIS DIRTY WORK FOR GROP KNOWS HOW LONG!?! AND HE WANTS ME TO. DO. BETTER!?!?”

Everyone nodded in understanding, knowing exactly what the commander was feeling because of their own experiences, they knew; they all knew how it felt like. Peepers had been apologetic another session ago (as apologetic as a former mean grouch can be) to the stories his men had shared for how he had treated them. They had accepted the apology easily and moved on since they were on the same boat er ship after all.

“I thought you guys were friends or something?” Barry spoke up after the commander had calmed down a bit.

“What?”

“Cause I dunno, I just thought since you two were close…” he shrugged

“… Honestly, I thought so too… but lately it seems that he doesn’t care at all.”

“Then why do you stick by the guy?”

 With the way Hater had been constantly treating him it’s a wonder why he stood by him for so long but…

“I care about him.”

It was true. Everything Peepers was today was because of Lord Hater and vice versa. He was there when Hater was feeling down when he thought why bother nothing ever goes right, he was there when he succeeded in conquering his first planet and saw his face lit up in joy and he had helped in doing that, he was there to tell him that conquering the universe was attainable that great glory of being the greatest in the galaxy is more than just a dream it could be real.

He was there to tell him of course sir, go for it! and he told him to be his commander…

 

The entire food court was silent and just when Peepers thought he was done with sharing, another watchdog piped up from the back almost meekly.

“A-are we your friends, sir?”

Commander Peepers was completely stunned and was absolutely terrified. This was it, wasn’t it... the feeling of dread in his gut, the burning and twisting and gnawing feeling he gets around them. He swallowed it down, way down, to finally formulate the most honest answer he has ever given in his entire life.

“I don’t know… and honestly don’t think I could but I sure hope to be…”

They were all there in comfortable silence an air of understanding that hung in the food court as they accepted the commander whole heartedly as more than just their kind but also their friend.

 

“I’d be your friend, sir!” Michael, always first to volunteer and to say something really dumb to ruin the mood

“Me too, sir!” Marty followed after his friend and tripping himself in the process

Soon the entire food court had every watchdog wanting to be his friend and Peepers thinks he might just welcome this burning feeling after all.

 

“Hey sir, dates in two days, you prepared?”

No

“No.”

“No?”

“No.”

Commander Peepers had just sealed his faith for the entire afternoon with more musicals and another book in hand.

 


	4. Chapter 4

A day before the ‘not a date’ and several eye rolls since his entire watchdog army was so sold on the idea it was a ‘date’ date and not a date ‘date’, Peepers had no idea why he was so nervous it was ridiculous.

All of the watchdogs were still helping him to prepare for it. Peepers had thought of it as a stupid waste of time for them when they should have been working. He let them continue anyway because- really Peepers, do you even know how to make friends if your only plane of reference for friendship was Lord Hater?

Besides, they work better if you let them do what they want so it’s probably profitable to just let them do whatever.

This wasn’t supposed to be so complicated. He only wanted Wander to stop foiling his plans, one way or another- to get rid of him. But after all of ‘This’, Commander Peepers was thoroughly confused and aching around his chest cavity. This was all because of Wander after all. The progress, the sharing sessions, his men’s improvement in work ethic…

Maybe he doesn’t want him destroyed after all… That’s preposterous, of course he does!

Right?

 

A watchdog, Kenny, had pointed out to him that he has problems with dealing and showing emotions to which Peepers had scoffed and asked him what was his evidence to support this ‘claim’. So the watchdog recounted an event that had happened yesterday detailing that when Commander Peepers had been given a card signed by several watchdogs and at the front of that card was a ‘Good work on that recital, baby girl!’ was crushed out and changed to ‘Good work xxxxxxxxxx, xxxxxx C. Peeps!!’, the commander had started crying and told everyone in the vicinity that he had caught dust in his eye- shut up! no!- we get dust in our eyes all the time, it’s practically our entire face!?- And furthermore, that’s absurd since when do I cry??

Then that same watchdog had also told him that he was frequently in denial and that was just plain silly.

All of these new feelings and destructive things it was doing inside of the commander’s body and Peepers had forgotten a major problem about this date that he had failed to see seven days ago.

He can’t be seen, out in a public setting, with Wander, having dinner, in a spot notoriously known for dating couples.

What if Lord Hater finds out? His dead more than just dead he’d get fired! And what if someone else were to see him with Wander? His reputation would be shot, blackmail, no one will ever take him seriously (even more than they already do). And Sylvia- oh grop, Sylvia… she was going to kill him!

He needed to find Wander to device a better plan or cancel it all together.

Except he can’t, because his men worked so hard to prepare him tomorrow that cancelling now would disappoint the entire army, reverting it back to the old times where Commander Peepers was above them and no one else gave a damn. When had he cared? Was he going soft?

And the feeling of dread was back, a little bit colder this time.

 

It was late at night and Peepers had been pacing in his room for who knows how long. His men had to just give him a sappy speech right before going back to his room. Now he was really screwed. What was he going to do? How was he going to pull this off? Where the hell is Wander??

“Good evening, Mister Peepers!”

Peepers had whipped out his blaster so fast that he only registered who it was when he aimed the weapon right at his face.

There he was, a smile on his face- practically beaming and overly excited because sometimes Peepers thinks this guy doesn’t know how to feel fear when it stares you down in the face.

“Wander, we need to talk.”

There was this weird kettle sound coming from Wander that made the commander lower his weapon just to stare at him quizzically.

“YOU DO REMEMBER!!” Wander exclaimed and was bouncing up and down giving the commander a headache.

“Okay, okay, stop! What-”

“Boy, did I worry myself silly over this whole thing. Knowin’ you, Mister Peepers, of course you’d be the type a guy to remember dates. I told Sylvia you would!”

Oh no. No no no no- Wait-

“How much did you tell her?”

“Hmm… It went something like ‘hey Syl, I’m goin’ to that fancy restaurant back at Lamouria and enjoy an evening with Mister Peepers and there’ll be lots of talking and getting to know one another-’ then she started laughing real loud sayin’ ‘Wander, buddy, don’t go joking like that!”

Oh thank grop, she thought it was a joke.

Wander continued “Then she said to never ever, EVER say silly things like that because there’s no way he would’ve remembered buuuuut YOU DID!”

“Look, listen, Wander…” Peepers started, still questioning himself whether or not the faith in his watchdogs mattered or his pride.

“Yeeeesss??” Wander, still beaming, still vibrating in joy.

“I-“a sigh “I don’t think this will work out…”

The smile faltered for a moment and Peepers thinks he’s going to die.

“O-oh, oh well! Golly, sure did excite myself the whole week- havin’ Syl tell me it ain’t happenin’… It’s okay though! I’m sure you are a very busy man, Mister P-“

“Oh, would you just shut up!? I am trying to talk here!” Peepers yelled, trying and failing to formulate actual words to help save him right now.

Wander was quiet, quiet in a hopeful way that made it even harder for Peepers to think straight.

You got his attention, you can do this.

“Okay, the thing here is, is that I only have a few sick leaves I can use as an excuse to get a free day off work tomorrow and that needs a few paper work-” Peepers had started pacing gesturing widely with his hands “that needs to be done and checked to be handed in to the commander. I’m the commander, so I can get away with just that but as the commander I also have to maintain presence in the ship. I had previous negotiations from the entire fleet already, that I wouldn’t be around so that covers that...” Peepers what was that big loud of flarp you just spat out?

Wander was still listening, thankfully looked like he followed every word of that. Good, he did not want to repeat himself.

“The deal is, Wander, I can’t be seen out in public with you or I’ll lose my job because I can’t be seen out by others…” Peepers finished, exhausted. He wanted this to end. The suffering had gone on long enough.

“Then why not we wear a disguise?”

“A-a what??”

“A disguise!” Wander said, like it was the most obvious answer in the universe.

“I- That… that could work!” This was insane, completely ludicrous, and Peepers can’t believe himself right now.

“I can’t wait to tell Sylvia the good news!” wait what?

“No, wait no-“ Peepers grabbed on to Wander’s shoulders. Staring him straight in the eye, he continued. “You can’t tell her!”

“I promise Syl won’t get ya fired.”

“No, I mean you can’t tell her about this and you can’t have her along!”

“But why?”

“B-because…” faith or pride, Peepers, what’ll be?

Commander Peepers gulped, then looked away completely red in the face.

“I’m s-shy and I only want to talk to you…” glorn please kill me

“Aww Mister Peepers, it’s okay! I won’t tell Syl if it makes ya feel better.”

“…”

“Well, gotta go! Sylvia’s waitin’ outside and told me to hurry up cause she said the security had gone up. I’ll be seein’ ya at 7! Later, Mister Peepers!” and he was gone.

 

Commander Peepers had slumped down to the floor, feeling like he could become one with it if he tried hard enough. What were you thinking you idiot, you don’t have the budget for a disguise… or do you?

 

The day of the date had finally arrived. His men were all excited and the sharing session over at the food court was mostly pep talk for Peepers because noticeably his men had seen him fidget whenever the topic came up. They were all so awfully supportive that there was no way he can back out now without curling up in a fetal position feeling like hell.

In the middle of all the reassurances one watchdog made a suggestion.

“Hey why not use an earpiece?”

“Paul, excuse me, what?

“So that we can help guide you?”

The entire food court made murmurs of agreement. Oh no.

“What!? No! I can’t have all of you at once!”

“How about five, sir?”

“No!”

“… two?”

The commander was absolutely done when he saw several watchdogs giving him a tactic that worked perfectly for their species to bring down people who had at least a little smidge of a soft side, the puppy dog stare, complete with shimmering sparkles. He sighed exasperated.

“Glorn almighty! Alright, fine! Two and only two! There better not be an entire battalion on the other side of the earpiece or I’ll have you all wipe the ship spotless using your own toothbrushes!”

That seems to have appeased them.

 

So for the next few hours, Peepers helped in narrowing down the entire watchdog army to only two who were within reasonable qualifications.

-They would have to be smart enough to operate an earpiece

-Has to have some sort of experience in friendly communication above their commander’s

\- Must not have any other work for the day

\- Must be trust worthy

\- No funny business

\- Michael is banned to give advises (because he ruins the mood)

 

Peepers had eyed the last requirement warily. He did not write the last one.

 

It was almost time for the date and Peepers was ready, probably. He appointed Marty and Michael for the operation because being close friends; they would at least know how to give advices about friendship. Besides, Michael ruins moods, he doesn’t need one.

Commander Peepers snuck out of the Skullship with all of the best wishes from his men before he left. He took a hovercraft and landed it on Lamouria, a planet shaped like a heart best known for the best dating spots, great restaurants, and a carnival.

Peepers ducked into a nearby bush to change into his disguise, a red dress with yellow stripes on the mini skirt and a skull on his belt. He put on a short blonde wig over his helmet and the lightning bolt shaped part of it was sticking out of his wig. And a blaster, kept away in his purse, just in case…

He felt ridiculous. No, not the disguise, that was fine, the whole situation, however, wasn’t.

 

Gathering up his wits, he checked if the earpiece in his wig worked.

“This is Commander Peepers. I have landed successfully on planet Lamouria, about to make my way over to the restaurant to begin operation: Play Pretend. Do you copy?”

There was snickering over on the other side.

“Michael! I told you two no funny business!”

“S-sorry sir! But- pfffft Ma-Marty fell over- I mean sir, yes, sir! Copy that!”

Peepers was going to have a migraine. Why did he almost believe this plan will go well without something stupid happening?

“Alright listen, both of you! How did you two become friends? I need reference.”

Michael’s voice spoke over whatever Marty was going to say “Marty tripped over himself and I laughed so hard!” Then Marty spoke up “Then Michael asked to be my friend after I face planted on the ground hahaha, can you believe this dork?” “You’re the dork!”

 

This was going to be a long and tiresome date and it hasn’t even started yet…

Rubbing his eye, Peepers asked again “Anything actually useful for me as advice!?”

“Just talk to them. Don’t worry about what, you’ll figure it out. Relax and have fun!” And that was what Marty was there for, thank grop.

Peepers entered the restaurant, scanning the area to find Wander, looking more than ready to kill than to have a good evening, talking over dinner with a ‘friend’. He wondered what kind of disguise Wander would have came up with until he spotted blonde flowing hair, a green dress, a little taller than him but still shorter than everyone else in the restaurant.

Wander

They just had to both show up in blonde wigs, great!

 

“Hello, Commander Peepers again, my date is blonde.”

“Sir, really?”

“Yes.”

“I kinda thought you’d be a red head kind of guy.”

“What!? Michael, WHAT?!”

“I just thought, sir, geez...”

 

This plan was already a disaster.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> so there are now drawings on each chapter because I wanted to ^^ gosh I'm just really happy about the comments! you guys are so nice aaa
> 
>  
> 
> [art also here in my tumblr ^^](http://hikaru-kitten.tumblr.com/post/143512284700/wandering-eye-fic-here-uh-writing-is-hard-aaa)


	5. Chapter 5

“Did you do the deep breaths I told you to do before, sir?”

“Yeah, yeah…” inhale exhale inhale exhale “how was that?”

“Sir… you kind of have to relax to relax? Taking deep breaths isn’t a chore?”

“Of course, Marty, I know that!”

 

Commander Peepers had exited the restaurant just to prepare himself. This wasn’t retreat, no, far from it. He was formulating back up plans and flow charts in his head on how to handle the date. It was simple. Talk to him, become his friend, use his weaknesses against him, take him down, easy as pie! Why was this so difficult?

The talking part, this is the first time they wouldn’t be interrupted by either his zbornak friend or time constraints. No Lord Hater, no obligations as a commander aside from his plans. He had plenty of experiences talking to his men at this point, a whole week of it actually, and technically had made friends with his entire watchdog army, probably? He can do this, it’s just Wander. A wandering orange spoon that spreads joy and happiness everywhere he went. Peepers can barely get a grasp as to why he does that. Particularly in life or death situations he puts himself into with a smile on his face. He can’t get a grasp as to what Wander’s deal is either.

Time to find out

 

“Alright, I’m ready.”

“Good luck, sir!” Marty answered back.

“Uhh… sir?” Michael asked with a hint of worry

“What is it now, Michael? This better not be another joke.”

“ There- there seems to be a limo shaped vehicle? It’s heading towards the planet.” No, it can’t be…

“Where’s it landing?!”

“… It appears to- grop- right where you are, sir!”

Oh no, this can’t be good.

Marty spoke through the earpiece again. “Sir, you have to save your date! We’ll pick you both up before Emperor Awesome can trap you down there.”

Commander Peepers should have been prepared for a surprise invasion because really, Peepers? Your luck is as good as cheap hovercraft replacement parts- absolutely useless. But was he going to get pushed around by a muscle headed fish jerk who owes the entire watchdog army half their salary? No, there was only so much Peepers can take before he goes all out and takes care of it himself. He’ll teach Emperor Awesome not to mess around with Commander Peepers!

“I’ll handle it.” Peepers answered back with determination clear in his voice, and possibly murder.

“S-sir… Just keep us in contact or if you need back up.” He could hear sniffling from the other side.

“Grop, he’s so cool! Good luck, sir!”

Of course he was

 

Rushing inside the restaurant, to find that people inside were already puzzled by the distant music outside. It was Awesome’s theme music blaring from above about to land his limo.

“Hey Mi- Miss! Over here!” Wander waved enthusiastically at him with a lighter more feminine voice than his regular one.

And that was Wander, yeah, he was still here. It spoke volumes about Commander Peepers, that the notion of having a regular conversation would terrify him but nearly calm and controlled under a potential world ending threat. Wow, Rick was right; he really did need a hobby.

He rushed over to the table Wander was at and sat across him.

“Wa-… uh”

“You can call me, Wanda! And your name is…?”

“P- Wait one moment…”

 

Peepers ducked his head under the table.

“Remember a session ago we talked about honesty?” he asked in a hushed voice

“Yes?” Both of them said in unison

“Guys, I’m disguised as a girl as well as my date, we are both men and we both know it.”

“Sir, you never cease to impress me.”

“Shut up, Michael! I can’t think up a name.”

 

“Petunia?”

“Patricia?”

“Penny?”

 

“I’ll take my chances with Penny, thank you.”

 

Wander stared at Peepers hunched form “Pardon me for interruptin’, you talking to someone under there? Ohhh! Could I talk to them too?”

Peepers pulled his head back to face Wander. “Oh nothing, nevermind all that- just call me, Penny. We got bigger problems right now.”

The music blaring outside became louder and louder as the vehicle was about to land. The people inside were noticeably beginning to panic. Peepers has to make up an attack plan fast.

“It’s Awesome.”

“Oh Miss Penny, I think so too! There’s so much to talk about!”

“No, not the date! Emperor Awesome, he’s the problem!”

“Ohhh, no wonder the music sounded so familiar.”

“Yeah, and once he gets in here, he’s going to get a lesson with messing with me and my men.”

He can hear Marty’s muffled crying, probably touched that their commander thought about them.

“Are you giving him a dance lesson?” Wander asked

“A what??”

“Oh! Is he going to hold a party here!?”Wander was bouncing in his seat in excitement. What was wrong with this guy? Emperor Awesome is a laughable joke compared to his Lord but he was a still a worthy threat.

“I hope not! And why are you so excited!? You travel all over the galaxy helping everyone. I’m sure you’re not that oblivious about Awesome’s world ending parties.”

“I know about the parties, I was there for one! It was great, though we had to stop it before it broke the entire planet.”

“And you survived? How?”

“Dance competition!”

“Of course, I bet you won and saved the entire planet too?”

“Yup!”

Huh

 

“Wow, sir, sounds like your date is one amazing guy!” Michael said over at his earpiece.

Whoops! He shouldn’t have let that one slip. Hopefully, it wasn’t too obvious.

 

“Uhh… Look, I got to handle this…” Then Commander Peepers had an idea and a little ding sound as a light bulb was switched on inside his head. “Oooorr… You could, I don’t know… help me?” he suggested to Wander, already thinking of all the chaos he could possibly squeeze from this unexpected partnership to stop Emperor Awesome.

Having a near unstoppable force on his side that had already defeated Awesome once was an advantage Peepers was willing to have on his side, begrudgingly. The only problem was that Wander was a wild card that often had the situation always leads him to win in the most peaceful ridiculous way possible. Although peaceful, had world conquerors, like Lord Hater, fail…

“I would love to!!” Wander said excitedly “What are we doing? Are we gonna join his party?”

But the real question is… Commander Peepers, what would you do? He knew his luck was garbage compared to Wander’s; it was a sadly proven fact. So why not take the back seat and let this spiral into absolute mayhem? Besides, if it goes bad for him at least he’d drag Awesome under the same bus too.

“First things first, we have to find out what Awesome is up to.”

 

The party limo had finally landed and Peepers can hear people running out from the restaurant only to be forced back in by fist fighters. Grop! He hoped his disguise was enough.

“Golly, what if Awesome has a date too?” Wander suggested

“I don’t think so; this place isn’t his style…” And the fact that Awesome wasn’t known to take anyone to a fancy date. He wasn’t the romantic type, he’d probably… He’d try to flirt with everyone here to amuse himself, maybe? Then threaten them if he doesn’t get his way. Have everyone else be forced to have ‘fun’ according to his standards of ‘cool’.

Wander thought for a moment “What if he’s looking for someone to hang out with?”

Emperor Awesome has entered the restaurant, practically strutting in with a confident punchable grin on his face and rows of sharp teeth that were mildy threatening. Peepers scoffed when Awesome started talking about himself. He tuned it out.

“What if he’s going to destroy us all with a giant boom box?” Peepers answered back

“Maybe he needs friends?”

“Please, the guy has plenty to ‘hang’ with.”

“Those aren’t his friends.”

“… what?”

“Think about it, his lonely. He wants to talk to someone.”

He could hear Marty make a thoughtful ‘huh’ over in the earpiece when Wander said that and Peepers could only agree. What would Peepers know about caring for others if not for the sessions he and his men had. Wander, someone who practically seeks to help others, certainly would know way more about it. This puts a light over Emperor Awesome’s behaviour and constantly wrecking planets with his world ending parties. He wants attention.

Still not going to excuse him, lonely with a truck load of issues or no, he was going to pay. And speaking of attention, it looks like all eyes were on Emperor Awesome currently. The entire restaurant was terrified in their seats as Awesome continued talking.

So apparently, Awesome had a party but got bored and thought ‘why not go to the next planet over and honour them with his ‘presence’’. And by honour, he meant terrorize. He got his fist fighters to replace the romantic background music to some loud party music that made the commander irritated. Wander, however, was feeling the beat and was completely alright with the situation. And was oblivious to the suffering of others? Or…

“Wan-Wanda! Look, his making people miserable by ruining their dates and turning it into his own personal party!”

Wander, seemed to stop to take in the situation.

“Now that’s not really nice…” Wander said almost crossed (almost) then brighten up in a smile. “A party should be enjoyed by everyone!”

“So what? Are we going to just let him?” Peepers was challenging him. Let’s see how the wanderer handles this.

“We should turn it into a party for all! Get everyone to enjoy it as much as Awesome. That way, their dates wouldn’t really be cancelled but better!”

Ruining Emperor Awesome’s party by making it their party, now that’s something Peepers could do.

Wander continued “Then Awesome is gonna have so much fun with everyone also enjoyin’ themselves! Unlike the last time he stormed out after losin’, I feel bad for him.”

“He got what was coming and honestly would benefit everyone’s sanity if he left.” Peepers said offhandedly

“No, he needs a friend to talk to. And I think, this party would help him if others were havin’ fun too! They’ll wanna actually like him!”

“Wanda, are you really going to feed his ego?”

“Feed his ego?”

Commander Peepers wasn’t the caring type but he knows what an ego centric narcissist is when he sees one. His Lord was probably one if not riddled with undertones of depression; Peepers knew this from taking care of Hater for a very long time. Awesome on the other hand, had all the people in the world to reassure him his inflated sense of importance was validated and if not force them, with sometimes deadly force.

“If we don’t stop him, he won’t learn his doing something wrong.”

“…” Wander was quiet in thought.

Listen to yourself, Peepers, are you seriously going with ‘helping others’ especially helping Awesome? The jerk who is the rival of his Lord? He feels like a replacement Sylvia, its making him sick just thinking about it.

 

He noticed a figure approaching their table and then he started to panic.

Was that Awesome making his way over to their table with a hint of something near predatory? Then Peepers noticed that they were the only table left not forced into the dance floor that Awesome had his fist fighters push some tables to the sides to make. They were too preoccupied with their talk that Peepers hadn’t noticed. Now Awesome was out to get them.

flarp

no no no no no

Awesome reached their table, casting his shadow over them. “Hey, can’t help but notice that you two cuties haven’t noticed this party going on here.” he said with a smirk “What, a little party shy? I can help with that.”  
Awesome said flirtatiously at both of them and Peepers may have vomited a little in his mouth. Awesome hadn’t seem to recognize them being in disguises which was great-

Wait, did that idiot just call him CUTE?!

He heard Marty from the earpiece again “Careful, sir! Don’t blow your cover by shooting him!! Put that hand away from that blaster!” got to hand it to Marty for knowing his hand was indeed on his blaster, hidden in his purse.

“No, thank you, sir.” Wander said with a huff to Peepers surprise. Did… did Wander constantly have a death wish?! The potential threat was right in front of them and he had the gall to say that?!

“Oh, a feisty one, I like that.” Awesome said now leering at Wander- ew. At least it wasn’t directed at him- oh no! no no no no! Awesome was now focused on him and Peepers was horrified.

“And how about you? You scared of me?” Awesome’s attention on him with a row of sharp teeth, now very menacing up close.

Marty, Micheal, WANDER??? His hand was now just about ready to pull up his blaster.

Just then Michael spoke from his earpiece.

“Act like the shy type!” WHAT?

“Just do it, sir! It’ll work trust me!” Peepers could hear the wink without actually seeing him wink. This was insane, why!?

Commander Peepers was fidgeting and the only thing that came out of him was an unintelligible “uh” and “ums” not looking at Awesome but instead focused solely on the floor, head down. This was humiliating.

Then Emperor Awesome started laughing and nearly toppled over. Peepers was going to kill him. Screw the mission to hell! He was going to shoot him, right here right now!

“You- bwahaha! You two are adorable!” Awesome was still laughing when he got some poor guy’s chair and sat with them. “Y’know, I had a crappy night but I might just actually enjoy myself here!”

Wander was glaring at Awesome with something like irritation, was this one of his many personas that the commander has heard him do from time to time? Peepers on the other hand, was still stubbornly not looking at Awesome, having a very convincing shy appearance. Please end me, his mind chants in desperation.

 

“I told you, sir, it was sure to work!” Michael said pleased with himself.

“Sir? Sir?? Are you okay??” Marty asked worriedly.

Nope, he was more than ready to bury himself six feet under at this point.

 

From the corner of his eye he noticed Wander, giving a small smirk at him. He had a plan didn’t he? That sneaky fun loving bastard… He wasn’t about to lose this game Wander was playing.

 


	6. Chapter 6

The entire restaurant was under the control of Emperor Awesome. What he wants, is a party that would compensate for the lame one he had a planet over or he would give a world ending party instead.

He had his fist fighters changed the soothing violins to irritatingly loud party music, added glaring lights that danced around the restaurant and tables filled with food and drinks that made Peepers grimace for how unhealthy they are. One fool actually tried one of the drinks and breathed fire for five seconds but other than that wasn’t good enough for the entire party to burn in flames- sadly. People were forced to stay and ‘enjoy’ the ‘rad’ party Awesome had graciously given to them, making their lame night ‘better’.

Overall it was a mess and a messy situation for the commander and wanderer. They were trapped with an attention seeking, party addicted, world destroying, big can of sardines with no way out.

 

Peepers was silently formulating plans to break himself out with his identity safe from being discovered. And maybe save Wander too. It should be expected from a ‘friend’ after all. Special bonus is to have Awesome pay, in cash and if possible in pain too, for the expense they had to pay for the Skullship’s damages. He just has a few major problems, one being, Awesome was still on their table!

The party had gone on without them. Though the people were afraid, they had managed to go from utter terror to vigilant wariness because Awesome’s attention weren’t on them. They began to silently reassure themselves in the loud and buzzing dance floor and others took the initiative to actually have fun in the forced party.

Awesome’s reign of terror had to be focused on Commander Peepers and Wander, currently disguised as Miss Penny and Wanda.

And for some unholy reason, Awesome had decided to flirt with them and only them throughout the entire restaurant.

Commander Peepers silently thank his watchdog Michael for the ‘shy act’ tactic. Now he can silently fume in rage at his current situation without drawing attention to himself if he were to violently combust in a verbal explosion of curses. That would have given him away as Hater’s second or third in command in a heartbeat.

Wander, on the other hand, had a different method to not giving away either of their identities. It was surprising to the commander that this was the same wanderer he had met up a few hours ago.

Wander was a completely different person.

His back was straight, had his hands either joined on the table or arms crossed over his chest. He had a deadpan expression to Awesome’s flirting and didn’t entertain any questions. A glare, a scoff, and several eye rolls were given to the emperor whenever he so much as suggests that Wanda was interested in him. At one point, Wander had took a long sip of his glass of water and feigned as if he hadn’t heard a single word uttered by Awesome the whole night.

Awesome had shrugged all of that as playing hard to get.

Peepers would have thought that Wander had swapped himself for an identical lookalike while the real one had made his escape if it weren’t for the glances he would give him.

Wander would be giving a huff of frustration at Awesome one moment and a small smile to Peepers the next. They were quick and hidden away but just enough for Peepers to see that Wander was silently reassuring him that everything will be alright.

Reassurance aside, Wander is drawing all of Awesome’s attention to himself and Peepers took the opportunity of distraction to continue formulating plans in peace.

So far, what he came up with was to sneak his way to the bouncer guarding the staff room without being spotted from about thirty fist fighters. Use ‘the puppy dog stare’ to get him to leave and if that doesn’t work- knock the hulking fist fighter out. Find the main electrical panel that powers the entire restaurant and shut all the lights sending everyone in chaos in the darkness. Hidden in the mayhem, the commander would make a run for Awesome’s party limo and that involves manoeuvring over obstacles such as getting stepped on in the dark or caught by fist fighters. Hijack the limo and ride free. Then sell the limo to the highest bidder at an auction planet for sweet revenge and then celebrate all the spoils he would get from it. Easy as pie!

It sounds possibly for the highly trained commander, except for some glaring problems. How do you get Awesome to leave them alone?!

And what was Wander planning? The commander was sure the notorious trouble maker had a plan on his own. He had underestimated the nomad many times in the past only to realize that whatever Wander plans to do would go his way no matter how ridiculous they were. Commander Peepers wasn’t stupid to let him off to do whatever while he did his own separate plans. Wander would somehow turn a 180 on him no matter what.

Even if currently they were on the same team! He wasn’t going to risk it. Besides, the commander was curious as to what Wander was actually going to do.

He was giving the space hobo too much credit… there’s no way.

Except when it does happen… what would you do then, Commander Peepers?

 

Awesome had his attention once again going back to him. He can handle this. The ‘shy act’ didn’t leave him much room for bigger conversations anyway.

Awesome leaned towards his direction and flashed a sharp toothy grin.

“Your friend here doesn’t seem to like me very much…” grop, Awesome, take a hint! Peepers silently counted up to ten to finally look up at Awesome head on. He was a trained army commander for pete’s sakes!

“Then maybe leave her alone?” He said in quiet defiance, still maintaining a timid appearance but voice firm enough to get the point across. Awesome had to leave them be to get going with a plan. But how much can he push it to not anger the emperor?

“Aw babe, you feel left out? There’s plenty of awesome to go around.” Awesome said inching closer to place an arm around him. A glistening huge arm and Peepers doesn’t think he can hold back from shooting the emperor if that arm even makes contact-

Then there was a splash as Awesome was drenched in whatever beverage Wander had grabbed from the person serving drinks around. Peepers was shocked and so was Awesome. Wander glared at him in a cold stare.

“Awesome, leave us alone.” Wander said straight and direct. The party seemed to have frozen in place when the fist fighter in charge of the sound system abruptly stopped the music with a loud scratch that filled the entire restaurant to see what orders Awesome would give after that. Everyone was now focused on Awesome and Wander on their table.

Awesome then started having a laughing fit like Wander had delivered the funniest line in the world. Peepers was nervously reaching for his blaster. This was going to get them captured and no amount of the ‘shy act’ was going to stop him from fighting back, identity at stake or no. What was Wander THINKING??

Awesome finally settled his laughter to face Wander, his smile predatory. “And why should I, Jess?” Jess must have been the name Awesome gave him because he wouldn’t bother.

“Because that’s my girlfriend and you need to leave us alone and this restaurant and every lovely couple in here or actually give us a better party.” Wander said with a smirk in the end. A smirk! Peepers can’t believe it; Wander just challenged Emperor Awesome to give them a better party. Wander just basically said ‘give us something good or go home’. He was crazy. They were so dead.

“This party ain’t enough for you, babe?” Awesome said his smile faltering for a bit.

“No, Awesome, it isn’t.” Awesome had sagged at the comment “Miss Penny, what do you think?” Wander asked directing the question at him and Peepers pupil had shrunken in size. What?  
Commander Peepers was now the attention of the entire restaurant and he had to swallow down a squeak. Now Wander pointed this mess at him and somehow he’s going to magic up a solution with a few words??

 

The commander’s earpiece spoke again after being silent for a long time.

“Sir, I think you should tell Awesome straight what his doing, I mean- like what you said, sir, he would never learn...” Marty said and Peepers had noticed that this watchdog was luckily very good on advices. He can trust his word on it.

 

“Awesome, me and my uh-“ did Wander say girlfriend? He sure did, didn’t he? “girlfriend… We were planning a quiet dinner together until you showed up and made us- all of us-” gesturing to the frightened crowd “feel threatened and uncomfortable… I well- I wouldn’t oppose an enjoyable party…”

Awesome had perked up at the last bit like he wanted to hear that all night.

“If everyone was on the same boat as well.” he finished and everyone was making murmurs of approval. So they were actually okay about the party after all.

“Annnddd you all want me to leave?” Awesome said almost dejected still maintaining his wide grin if not forcefully.

Then Wander stood up and placed a hand on Awesome. “No, no, you’re fine! Just do us all a favour and let everyone enjoy themselves as much as you are.”

And we went right back to Wander’s first plan, unbelievable.

“Sure thing, J-“ “Wanda, please.” “Wanda, right…”

 

The party had resumed but now Awesome was letting all of them do what they would want. One of them suggested putting the colorful lights on one area instead of the entire place. Thank grop, Peepers could have gone blind. The restaurants staff had decided that this night would be free for all the troubles that everyone had to endure. Well, it was Awesome’s fault but no one was willing to take the chance to sue him just in case Awesome really does pull a world ending party.

Hesitation was still there for the infamous world ender but he wasn’t called the party animal for nothing. He had fun on the dance floor and others followed suit.

 

Wander pushed his chair to sit closer to Peepers and gave him a wide joyful smile. He can practically feel him radiating with what had happened. Peepers rolled his eye.

“Miss Penny, I’m so glad everyone is happy in the end! And you! You were great with what you said to Awesome! ”

“You knew this would happen.”

“I just knew Awesome wouldn’t be that mean! All he needed was a friendly push to do the right thing. And everythin’ turned all right in the end!”

 

Then the night went on and everyone was having fun and Wander wouldn’t let go of his hand throughout the entire party.

 

They had joined the dance floor or in other words Wander had dragged Peepers into it. Peepers for the most part had his eye shut so the lights wont blind him. Awesome, already enjoying himself was thrilled to have them there too. And Wander thinks he can show him how to dance? Psh! Yeah, right! He himself had taught Hater how to dance, he got this.

Peepers wasn’t about to admit he had fun in the party. This was strictly business and he wouldn’t allow to get out showed like that on the dance floor.

 

 

Hours later and he was tired from the ordeal. He could hear the two watchdogs over at the earpiece congratulating him for a mission well done. The mission wasn’t done yet, idiots. Peepers didn’t say that out loud though because technically avoiding having the entire planet break into a million pieces was probably a success.

Didn’t get the revenge he wanted but at least he was able to relax for once.

And once again the day was saved by Wander and his ridiculous peaceful methods.

And Wander wasn’t done yet.

 

After the party and everyone going back to their respective planets, Wander had spotted Awesome about to leave and wanted to talk to him. Peepers had followed only a little bit curious.

“Awesome, what exactly happened at the other party before all this?” Wander asked.

“That one? What about it?”

“You got bored and… that’s it?

“Weellll- Look, it sucked. Rough night, terrible venue, the whole thing just… Anyway, I wanted outta there and this place wasn’t all too far.”

Peepers cut in incredulously “Then you terrorized everyone here to have a ‘better party’?”

“You all were probably bored-“ Peepers and Wander glared “Alright, alright! It was an off night I wanted to cut loose on that other planet and ended up… everyone was… It’s an off night- long week. It’s one of those days where you’re just not feelin’ it, y’know? And that’s crazy! I love to party! And world ending parties are my gig it’s just…” Awesome trailed off.

“Did something bad happen?” Wander asked concerned.

Awesome was a little hesitant until he finally got it out “I- remembered… some stuff and- just wanted to get rid of it. A lot of parties that didn’t really do much on helping and- Babe, listen, I did enjoy this one- something small. It helps, really.”

“We all have our off days…” Peepers said remembering his Lord having ‘the funk’ so he had to literally drop all work to ensure he got better. If going into an unsuspecting planet and terrorizing its residence would do the trick then-… wait. Peepers had no right to judge Awesome’s actions when he and his Lord did basically the same thing.

Wander made a hum of agreement. “Even if you had a rough day, it doesn’t excuse your actions today.”

Awesome bent down to give them a smile, sharp teeth and all “You’re just lucky you found me in a generous mood…” Because he was still a world destroying conqueror and they were having idle chit chat. As if he wouldn’t turn the tides on them at any moment.

Awesome barked a laugh when he noticed Peepers flinched “Hey relax P- Pepper was it? Whatever, anyways, here-“ he handed Peepers a sizable amount of cash, not nearly enough as the commander would have wanted it but surprised him nonetheless.

“Uh- thanks?”

Awesome had already made his way to the limo about to leave but before that he called out. “You two girls have fun!”

Peepers twitched, what was that all about?

Wander was staring at him and smiled big and warm. The commander was so used to his smiles that he didn’t grimace this time.

“Well, that was fun, Miss Penny, or should I say, Mister Peepers.” Wander said grinning, voice going back to his usual.

“Do you treat everything as a game, Wanda? Or should I say W-“ Peepers frantically off his earpiece. “WAnder…” That was so careless he nearly forgot.

Wander was thoughtful then brighten up again “Hey, Mister Peepers, we didn’t do much talkin’ earlier… If you’re not too busy, do you think we can still talk?” He asked hopeful.

Peepers considered it and since his night was already eventful enough, he wasn’t ready to return back to the Skullship just to be crowded by thousands of watchdogs asking him about the date. He needed a little respite before going back in that burning chaos again. “Sure, why not?”

Wander did that high pitch kettle sound again and the commander guessed he’d have to get used to that eventually.

If they were going to have a conversation, Peepers had to off his earpiece for good this time. Who knows how obvious it was to the two watchdogs already. But seriously, a watchdog that trips on nothing and a janitor can’t possibly be that perceptive?

Wander was excitedly rambling about all the things they could talk about and Peepers took the chance to turn on his earpiece while the nomad was distracted.

He was about to tell them he wouldn’t be on the earpiece for a private conversation with his date, already expecting the barrage of winks from Michael, he heard something concerning from the other side. There was shuffling and murmurs then it was quiet. What was going on in there?

Wander’s attention was back and he noticed Peepers going still “Everythin’ all right, Mister Peepers?”

He heard some rumbling from the ear piece, grop. “I have to take a call.”

“Sure! I’ll go on ahead to that hill over there. Seems like a fine evenin’ for star gazin’!” Wander said cheerfully and walked off with a skip. Leaving Peepers to assess what had happened to the two watchdogs.

 

“Commander Peepers here, what’s going on?”

“PEEPERS!” he jumped. It was an unmistakable loud and gravelly voice…

 

Lord Hater

 


	7. Chapter 7

Commander Peepers thought his plans wouldn’t have any more hiccups but this night was just constantly proving him wrong.

A cold shiver ran past him when he heard the all too familiar rough and unforgiving voice of Lord Hater. He was done for…

 

“S-sir!” Peepers laughed nervously “W-well, everything in tip top shape back at the ship? I’m sure you are having a fine evening as well, s-sir…” What was Hater doing in the secret room he had placed Marty and Michael!?

Hater growled “Peepers…” 

The commander gulped. Was he in trouble for leaving the ship? He did his paper work and the rest of the watchdogs covered everything else. He thought he took care of Hater when he gave him a video game to play before he left. Why was he here!?

“Sir, y-you may be wandering where I am and probably furious-”

“Oh I know EXACTLY where you are! And furious doesn’t even come close!”

 

He’d have to cancel Wander on that talk if Lord Hater were to demand him back on the ship. Possibly get punished for disappearing even if he had the paper work done and excuses going through the roof. If Hater wanted him back immediately, there was no arguing. He feels dread but not all of it was directed at Hater’s inevitable wrath.

He was hoping for a calm night, a break from work, to relax himself away from duties for only a little while…

A talk

 

“Why didn’t you tell me you had a date!?” Hater said in his loud and booming voice, snapping Peepers out of his thoughts.

“E-excuse me, sir? Date? W-who told you that!?”

“I overheard it when I wanted to get a milkshake!”

“But, sir! You could have ordered a milkshake straight to your room!”

“But you weren’t here! And nobody would tell me where you were!”

Oh, right…

“Nevermind all that! Did you tell her how awesome I am? Well, duh! Of course you did. I’m so totally cool and being associated with me gets you dates, right?”

“I- uh-“

“I bet she’s a huge nerd like you to even go out with you. Did you talk about boring math junk the whole time? Did she say anything about me?”

Technically, Wander has a lot to say about Hater. Like, buddies and all the nice things that would typically never be associated to someone like Hater, ever.

“…N-nothing but high praises, sir!”

“Hah! I knew it! Can’t say I’m jealous, Peepers, my own commander getting a girlfriend before me. Because I’m sure you two are perfect… perfectly BORING to be able to put up with each other!”

Distantly from the earpiece, Peepers heard Michael say “It’s a boyfriend, sir.” and the commander chokes on his own spit.

MICHAEL!

“Boyfriend!? Is that true, Peepers?”

“Uh-” Would lying to Lord Hater save him or get him into deeper trouble? “…Yes, sir?”

“Huh…”

There was a pause and Peepers fidgets under the night sky over the long silence.

“So…” Hater starts after a while “How does that affect my bet with Awesome? I mean, we didn’t set any rules or anything- just, Peepers gets date or somethi-”

“Awe-? You did what now??”

“Awesome!” Hater shouts aggravated “He was all taunting and junk saying there’s no way us ‘lame’ nerds could get dates! And I said ‘HAH! I bet Peepers could get one and he’s a lamer nerd than you!’ then he said something something I forgot, made me pissed off because only I get to call you that! And he dares say I’m not evil enough!?”

Three days ago, in a meeting room where Hater was in a foul mood, nearly taking out his frustrations on his commander before going into lunch break.

Hater continued his rant “He was all ‘Let’s bet some cash in it!’ so he could buy a new pair of pants or whatever and I said FINE!! And clearly I won this one! Awesome is gonna have to pay up!”

 

Wait…

Commander Peepers looked down at the bundles of cash in his purse that he received from Awesome not that long ago and froze when he realized.

Awesome knows

 

…

 

Flarp drasit! Was he going to have to assassinate someone tonight?

But then again, Wander did help Awesome. Whether he liked it or not, Wander was his usual helpful self and Peepers played a hand in it too. Maybe Awesome would shut up about getting help from two of his enemies... Maybe he’s actually grateful.

That would also mean Peepers would have to hand in the cash to Hater and gained nothing out of his previous revenge plan, if he could call it a plan. It slipped right though his hands the moment Wander took control. He shouldn’t have expected anything else.

Ah yes, your great luck, Commander Peepers, truly holds no bounds.

 

Peepers sighed “Not to worry, sir. You won the bet and the pay is with me.”

“What? How was Awesome able to give it to you?”

“He was at the restaurant, sir. More like, crashed in unannounced. Caused quite the trouble and turned it into a fist fighter surrounded, lights flashing, big muscled fish hovering, nightmare. But psh! No big deal, it was dealt with.”

“He WHAT!? Was he trying to sabotage your date? I swear, that unfair cheater is gonna answer to me for ruining it!”

“Sir?”

“Well, jokes on him for trying! Hah! Great work, Peepers!”

Lord Hater had just told him great work… “W-why, thank you, sir!” The bitterness of not getting his revenge and the cash seeming to fade away, that’s good enough for him to think this night wasn’t a total failure!

“Now, return back to the ship! I could buy a new console with that.”

He glanced at the hill Wander had told him to meet up after the call.

“Sir, the dates not quite done yet… Can you maybe wait?”

“She- I mean he- he’s still there? Wow, Peepers, how?”

“Yeah, uh- kind of waiting for me, actually…”

“Then what are you waiting for!? Hurry it up! And get here as soon as you’re done!” Hater hanged up and the earpiece buzzed back to life a second later. He heard Marty fumble for a bit with the wires.

“Sir? Are you okay?”

He rolled his eye at his constant worries “Yes, Marty, I’m fine.”

“That’s great, sir! Do you- do you still need our help?”

“No, its fine… uh- good work, both of you.” He could hear sobbing from the earpiece and the sound of light patting from Michael comforting his friend.

“Good luck to you, sir! And call us when you need us to pick you up!” Michael said cheerfully and the earpiece turned off.

 

Peepers breathed a heavy sigh. The night wasn’t over yet, the galaxy hadn’t exploded, he still has that talk he owes Wander.

He refrained from saying ‘easy as pie’ because nothing is easy when it comes to his life or Wander- specifically anything at all that has to do with Wander. He doesn’t want to jinx it. Again.

 

Going up the small hill, he found Wander completely relaxed. He was lying on the grass on top of the hill resting with his arms behind his head, gazing at the stars under the moon light with a lazy peaceful smile on his face.

Wander heard his footsteps with the sound of grass swishing and swashing under the commander’s boots and patted the ground next to him without breaking his gaze from the stars.

“Did Hater call ya?”

The commander lay down beside him, a foot apart. The cold grass and cool breeze from the top of the hill was nice… It was comfortable, relaxed.

“He was… worried.”

“Did ya reassure him about everthin’? Don’t wanna worry ol’ Hatey if we stay here awhile.”

“He was worried about losing a bet that has something to do with me- confidential, don’t ask- and yes, I did reassure him, and he won and… told me I did a good job…” Peepers trailed off the last bit fondly still coming down from the high that he was praised for his work. Even how little it was.

Wander had turned away from the sky and was staring at him with a smile because of course, that’s what he always does. The stars glittered above them and it seems to have reflected on Wander’s eyes like he wanted Peepers to see them too. But Peepers head was literally an entire eyeball so really, the commander was doing a better job at that than him. He had a wider sky reflected on his own eye. Wander should be thankful.

Peepers still needed to collect information on Wander so he starts with the obvious question.

“Wander?”

“Yes, Mister Peepers?”

“This, ‘helping others’ deal that you do, why?”

“Like what I always say, it never hurts to help!”

“Right, so what? Do you gain infinite good karma out of it?

“Ha ha! Heaven’s no.”

“So that’s just it? You want to help because you want to? Like you’re drawn to it?”

“Yup!”

“Explain to me why.”

“Well, it starts down in my left toe, rises up through my gutty works-

“I believe you’ve said this before- in a surveillance video- something something guts and gore, yadda yadda- but really why?”

“No no, Mister Peepers, it just feels good!”

“…” Was Wander just a fool that can’t help himself but to help others? Is that all he was and Peepers just spent all his time trying to understand him?

“Y’know how vast the universe is?” Wander asked out of nowhere.

“Yes… I live on a ship- I travel it daily.” Conquering planets under Lord Hater, Wander knows this but where was he going with it?

“It get’s kinda cold out there without a heater… All ships have heaters, right?”

“Yes, they do. It's standard issue to have all ships be built in with a heater...”

"That’s good…”

Commander Peepers was just about to ask why when Wander starts talking.

 

“Isn’t the night sky just beautiful? Reminds me of that time I travelled in the mosaic galaxy… Though not as grand cause I tell ya, it was just breathless out there!”

“The mosaic galaxy… that’s- that is home to large beasts! Constantly destroying, consuming, within their own galaxy. It was marked off from maps, warned about in books, avoided for a reason. Nothing there but the broken remains of planets and dust and those creatures… It’s a play ground for celestial giants!”

“Yup!” Wander replied confirming that, yes indeed that is the same galaxy they are both talking about.

“… No,” He watched Wander knowing full well that he was the kind of lunatic to somehow find a way and the only question is “How?”

Wander’s gaze returned to the stars and hummed looking thoughtful. “That was… a while ago, huh…” He said more to himself than to the commander. Peepers focused straight ahead looking at the stars, waiting for him to start. He still needs to ask about the heater but travelling to a forbidden area like mosaic galaxy had the commander intrigued. Then he heard Wander giggle.

“Heh, okay, now I remember! In my travels I happen upon a lovely elderly couple and asked for directions to the nearest orbubble station and they told me to go through this asteroid belt west from them and to keep on going. Now, the sweet old pair was actually blind but they were also experienced travelers back in their time and I trust them enough. And if I recall correctly, their cookies were phenomenal!

Majority of the area was closed off with warning signs all over- buuuut they did tell me to keep on going and I trust their judgment on it, so I did! And after a while my bubble popped and I landed on a small moon and waited.”

“Hold on…”

“Hm? Yes, Mister Peepers?”

“You haven’t mentioned Sylvia once.” Peepers pointed out. In a long string of sentences where Wander doesn’t mention his travel companion once was odd to the commander. As well as the story Wander was recalling…

“Oooh right, silly me, I forgot to explain the part where Syl and I haven’t met yet!”

That means he travelled alone in an orbubble that would have taken him… Wander’s story wasn’t adding up. The commander tries to remember the books he has read about the mosaic galaxy and its surrounding areas. “Right… So you waited?” Peepers prompted for Wander to continue.

“Yeah! So I waited and waited then finally a ship! So I hopped on board and they were also equally lost folks so I told them to keep on moving forward! So we did!”

“Then you mistakenly traveled to the mosaic galaxy?” Peepers asked sceptically.

“Yup! But not after colliding with an unexpected meteor.”

“And survived?”

“Yup! Uh- a little fuzzy but I remember that we landed on a pretty rainforest like area- all trees, barely any sun light, real pretty- we were all fine with the ship mostly intact-“

“Colliding with a meteor that knocked you and the ship to another galaxy and crashed into a dense rainforest- mostly intact?”

“Well it was a pretty big ship.”

“Did it at least have energy barriers? You said unexpected so I’m guessing there wasn’t enough time?”

“Yup!”

“What kind of ship can survive a meteor, mostly intact and with all of their crew, no energy barrier, crashing in a rainforest, in the mosaic galaxy no less!?”

Commander Peepers had found several elements to Wander’s story that were… wrong. Was Wander lying?

An orbubble can go for about roughly five hours without any hindrances along the way. His zbornak companion wasn’t with him at the time placing the distance of the elderly couple and the asteroid belt too close together and is prohibited by galaxy law. Even if they were blind, galactic officers would relocate them to safer areas much much further than Wander’s story suggests them to be.

If there were warning signs, they wouldn’t be just signs! The whole area should be secured by energy barriers, check points, tight security… that place was dangerous with rare moon rocks being cultivated by empires and the rest were securely closed off to make sure no one entered. A ship can’t just get lost in there. A ship, if it was in fact big enough, wouldn’t be able to squeeze through security. And no ordinary ship can survive a meteor to the next galaxy.

Peepers sat up to look at Wander straight in the eye because he would never peg Wander for a liar even if he was the enemy. It just… it’s not Wander.

Wander smiled at him. 

“A pirate ship.”

“A-a pirate ship?” Pirate ships were a thing of the past. Why bother being a pirate when world conquering was much more profitable? There were no pirates today and none that Peepers know of from villain boards or the net. They were obsolete.

“Well maybe we can continue this story another time… it’s getting late and Syl’s  already here to pick me up.”

Peepers jolted up at the mention of Sylvia to find her, calm and casually, approaching them. She didn’t even look surprised when she saw him next to her precious companion. Also hadn’t batted an eye at the fact that they were both in disguises and he was sure she was able to see through it the second she saw him.

All of the commotion that had happened and Peepers had overlooked that Sylvia is Wander’s transport and would have to pick him up in the end. He would have slapped his face at how obvious that was if he wasn’t currently shocked in place.

Wander stood up alongside the currently immobile and twitching in horror commander to happily wave at her.

“Hiya, Syl!”

“Hey, Wander. How was your date?”

“It was great! I had a lot of fun and there was a party too!”

“That’s great, buddy. Say, you mind if I get to talk to Peepers for a bit? It’s private; could you wait down the hill before we go?”

“Sure thing! Bye, Mister Peepers! I hope we get to meet up again soon for the rest of the story!”

Peepers was able to let out a stiff “Yeah…” and watched Wander run off down the hill. Gathering up his composure he faced the zbornak.

“Zbornak…”

“Optic nerd… Y’know, if you’re keeping this up, you might as well call me by name.”

He murmured a ‘like that’s gonna happen…’ that he didn’t even try to hide. Squinting at her he asked “What do you mean by ‘keeping this up?’” fingers doing the air quotation marks.

“Yeah, this. Don’t think I haven’t caught on to what you’re trying to do here, ‘pal’” Sylvia air quoted back and Peepers confirms his fears. Sylvia was perceptive and that was exactly why he didn't want her to catch on too soon. “Well, here’s the deal, Mister Peepers, you can try all you want. I ain’t stopping you.”

Peepers eyed her suspiciously “Why wouldn’t you?”

“Because my buddy,” Sylvia said shaking her head in fondness. She smiled at him that didn’t hold any threats. “says he had fun and wants to continue talking to you.”

“Wait, that’s it? No, 'if you hurt him and you're dead speech?'”

“Yeah. And besides, he did the same thing for me once. Some time ago…”

“What do you mean?”

“Nothing. Just, bear in mind that I was a former bounty hunter before Wander went and smiled at my face and the ‘hurt him and you're dead speech’? was already established from day one. I don’t need to repeat myself by taking Lady Haymaker and the Duchess of Wailing out.” Peepers gulped

“It’s late. Night nerd, see’ya!” She said with a smirk and left him to meet Wander at the bottom of the hill.

 

They made an orbubble and floated away, leaving the commander.

 

\---

 

“Sir, do you need us to pick you up?”

“Pick up my dead body on the floor while you’re at it, why don’t you?” Peepers said muffled by the ground he was lying face down on. Letting Marty sputter questions after questions as to what exactly does he mean by that? And Peepers had the exact same reaction to Wander. Just Wander in general was a big question! He wants the fool to answer them without changing the subject! He needs answers. He is going to see him again and demand them!

The grassy floor was soothing, comforting, cool like death’s welcoming arms at this point.

Apparently wasn’t cold enough to save him from how much he is burning right now.

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> a bunch of headcanons that I have are here ^^


	8. Chapter 8

Returning back to the Skullship, Peepers handed Lord Hater the cash and Hater retreated back to his room to gloat over his victory to Awesome on the net, leaving the commander to about two dozen watchdogs and counting wanting to know how the date went. Commander Peepers avoided all their questions about the date and told everyone that he was exhausted and wanted to turn in for the night. Going back to his room, he had some hours of sleep before work starts in the morning and the commander was far from tired. He was livid.

Kicking a table and hurting his foot, the commander tries to calm down.

Wander wasn’t supposed to get to him, the entire mission was a mess from one unexpected turn to another, and on top of that Sylvia found out and his plans had become a little bit complicated.

Originally it was, befriend Wander and get rid of him behind Sylvia’s back so she wouldn’t be able to stop him when the plan finally acts out… but she was letting him! He has an open chance to do so, letting the commander get close to the wanderer and Sylvia was going to turn a blind eye because…

There was no way he was going to let Wander get to him. There wasn’t anything that Wander had that could possibly want the commander to keep him around for.

Except for heaters and a promised continuation to an impossible story with pirates in it…

Commander Peepers resisted the urge to look into it. He wasn’t supposed to let Wander get to him. His story doesn’t matter. He needed to get Wander to leave them alone for good, not to stick around!

That night Peepers had dreams of a ship travelling through shards of glass and somewhere in there the heater needed fixing.

 

Morning came and Peepers put his spy training to the test narrowly avoiding every watchdog in sight, which was a feat being on a ship entirely filled with them.

He had work to do and last night left an awful taste in his mouth. The mission wasn’t a failure but all the inconveniencies and the way it was handled and the fact that his thoughts would linger back at the night’s conversations was not doing good for his patience. It made him irritated the longer he tried to wrap his head around it, which he wasn’t, he shouldn’t. And, no, Peepers was not looking into it. He was not going to check the heaters in the ship and he was definitely not going to check the credibility of the story through books about space pirates in the library.

And being asked by the entire fleet about that night was not doing well for his sanity.

The commander didn’t need to be reminded by it every turn he went.

 

In the food court, Commander Peepers was able to swipe a sandwich and manoeuvre his way to the meeting room without getting caught by the few hundreds of watchdogs awake in the early morning.

Lord Hater slept in and the meeting started without him. There weren’t any current pressing matters that he should let the Lord know, not with all the rushing Peepers was doing to get out as soon as possible. The meeting was brief, cut short with the commander escaping the room before anyone was able to catch him.

He claimed to be too busy to be at the lunch sharing session and cringed at the sad looks he got. The commander already knew what the topic for the day would be and avoided all routes leading to the food court like the plague.

As well as Andy’s ‘Eye on the Skullship’ show. Why did he assign the nosiest watchdog to handle the security cameras? Andy was at every hall, corner, room, elevator, even the torture room! That Peepers was going to, whether the commander had work in that area or not, Andy was all over the place. And being the one who handled surveillance, it wasn’t that hard to track the commander down.

And yet, somehow Wander always manages to get in without sounding the alarms sometimes or getting caught by watchdog patrols. How does he do that?

No no no NO! He was not thinking about HIM.

The commander was growing more and more agitated by the minute. No, he wasn’t the least interested, intrigued or even mildly curious about Wander. He was a happy helpful homeless fool and that’s it. Not even worth a bit the commander’s time, and yet... He wasn’t supposed to get to him!

Later that day after passing two ominous ship wrecks with multiple holes on them, it was clear why when the Skullship was invaded by parasites. Alarms were going off as a large group of insect like creatures crawled in and started eating through several surfaces of the ship.

There were watchdogs running all over the place, some with blasters helping, some just running and screaming, and others trying to close up the holes in order to keep the numbers of the parasites inside the ship at bay. Commander Peepers would have been furies at those pesky things causing more damage and more money spent on repairs but right now, he was welcoming the distraction.

Three hours later and they were still fighting the parasites off. Seeing almost no end to them as they continuously poured in from multiple holes in the ship until Hater finally woke up. More like, he was still trying to wake up but was up none the less, grumbling about the noise still half asleep.

Peepers ran to where Hater was, who was still too groggy from sleep to notice the battle going on, blasting a parasite and rolling to defend Hater by his side. “Sir, the ship is under attack!! Sir! Sir, wake up!!”

“Wuh-… Wha… Is Waaander here again?...” Hater asked still not fully awake.

Seeing as Hater was still blinking off sleep and the damages would have the commander yelled at, Peepers thought of a bright idea. “Yes, sir! In fact, he’s running all over the place!”

Hater readied a large attack, one that would sweep the entire area, green electricity sparking off of him dangerously.

“WATCHDOGS RUN FOR COVER!” Peepers yelled and they all scattered to safer hiding spots just in time and the battle was over in one big blast. All of the parasites that had entered the ship were now dead and Hater had saved them.

All while being half asleep- Wow.

Hater grumbled about food and Peepers ushered him off to the dining room where it was miraculously undamaged. He ordered several teams to check if the parasites were all cleared off and have the rest help clean up and do repairs. After Peepers made sure that Hater wouldn’t wake up to a war zone on his ship, he helps guide him back to his room to get more sleep.

The commander quickly went back to work assessing the destruction and so far all was… going to be costly.

The bodies of the charred parasites were all disposed of but the mess was still there and a janitorial team were currently at work to clean the rest up. Most of the damage was at the entrance to the Skullship where all of their hovercrafts were parked. There were five crafts that had become an indistinguishable pile of mesh on the floor and the rest were missing a few parts. Right now the front of the Skullship looked like the giant skull was suffering tooth decay. Hater was not going to like that and good thing he wasn’t conscious yet. Peepers would have to lecture the lord about staying up late but he did escape Hater’s wrath so he might as well breathe easy for now.

Some of the parasites had managed to enter into deeper levels of the ship but not by much when they made a barricade out of the tables of the food court to stop them. Sigh, more salary cuts the commander would have to work through.

Peepers volunteered to go alone to inspect the engine room at the lower deck despite protests from several watchdogs to come along too. He can handle a few bugs, if there were any, in the lower decks of the ship…

Also he had managed to divert his thoughts to work rather than other things he shouldn’t be delving into and questions about said topic would have the commander lose it.

 

The lower decks were home to the bigger machineries that powers the ship. Luckily the doors to the engine room were heavily secured and so far the commander had not seen a single parasite. They must have done a good job holding them off from going any deeper than the main hall and the blast from Lord Hater was sufficient enough to get all of them.

Peepers was going to walk back before he spotted a room for backup generators and entered it. He supposes he should inspect the room for bugs somewhere or check if there were any repairs he would have to take note of-

Generators powers machinery, electrical devices, lights, heaters-

 

There was a sound of a wet plop from behind the commander followed by a clank of metal.

 

“Hi, sir, how’s the-“

“Grop, would everyone shut up about the-!?

 

Michael stood there surprised with a mop in his hand and a bucket close by him on the floor. His uniform was filthy and he smelled horrible but after the whole fiasco with the parasites, it’s no surprise. Peepers should look just as haggard if not worst right now.

The other watchdog quirked at him questionably and Peepers may have walked himself into a trap he was trying to avoid all day. It’s time to make a quick excuse.

“The- the tables! I get it, we wouldn’t be able to hold a proper session without most of them-“

“Uh… sir?”

“What?!” Peepers replied a little strained, wanting to sprint out of the room in case if he starts- if he starts asking-

“Would- … I-“ Michael looked to the side and waved a hand at the generator closes to him. “I mean I can’t hold judgement- you probably have a reason but- why are you here?... for tables?”

“What!? No, I am not here for tables! That’s obvious, seeing as-“ Peepers waved wildly at their background, “this isn’t the place for them!”

“And you’re here because?”

“I needed a breather.”

“This place is dusty-“

“Away from the main hall-“

“Down here?”

“Look, it’s been one hell of a long day!” Peepers was exasperated now but at least Michael wasn’t asking about the one thing he doesn’t want to be asked about, which was surprising- since he was there with Marty having heard the conversations, the party, the very end of the date…

Has the other watchdogs already asked him and his friend about it? Were they going to ask for clarification? The rest of the story? Who knew? Peepers certainly wouldn’t when he had escaped everyone who tried to talk to him.

“Sir, you’ve been avoiding everyone… and I mean everyone, sir. You’re worrying Marty.”

“It’s work, it’s fine!” what was he afraid of? It’s just-!

“I don’t think-“

“I don’t give a flarging damn about what you think this is, Michael! It’s nothing! I’m fine! The whole day was a flarging fantastic cluster flarp of great amazing events and you know what? So was last night! I could care less if last night burned up in flames! I don’t get it! Why is everything constantly burning and going wrong since the start of this mission!? Every time I so much as blink all of you guys go and burn me to the core, it’s making me sick!”

At the end of his rant, Peepers was huffing out of breath and Michael was standing there just staring at him. Maybe he shouldn’t have exploded like that but he was not okay with so many things going on at once. It was breaking whatever routine he had ever since he started the mission. It was supposed to be easy. He wasn’t supposed to get to him.

Michael stared at him with something unreadable and Peepers presumes he was trying to take all of whatever he had regrettably spewed out. Which were a lot and the commander was going to have to face his army of watchdogs eventually but to have it literally explode to one…

The watchdog janitor took a deep inhaled then let out a long exhale. His focus back to the commander, “Do you hate us, sir?”

Not that long ago the commander had maybe agreed to be everyone’s friend- maybe. It wasn’t a solid answer from the commander. He only wanted for them to give him respect and there was respect. There was just so much that he hadn’t accounted for… like feelings and caring and yuck! He was going soft!

But…

It was nice, it was warm,

It was currently the entire watchdog army wondering what the hell was wrong with their commander because now they actually care to be worried about him.

And truthfully the commander had gotten accustomed to it. The Hater army wasn't supposed to be a caring place. It was a warship, they are an army to an evil overlord- and it was cold and it was lonely and it wasn't ever meant to be this... nice or warm among them. Ever since... 

“…No.” Peepers answered because he cant. They are idiots and he was their commander under a bigger idiot. And Peepers can't bring himself to hate the big one and recently he can't hate everyone else who looks up to him. 

“Well, that’s great! Excuse me, sir. I just want to thank you for telling me all this and not someone else like I don’t know… Marty maybe?” Michael speaking sweetly and Peepers is a trained commander he knows this kind of talk would only follow with- “’Cause if you had told Marty all of that and presumably because we are both present with you through earpiece last night- you’d make him cry.”

That unreadable look may have been murder and Peepers would laugh at the idea of a janitor threatening him right now but with the way Michael was at some point covered in gore to clean up the main hall. Dispose the bodies and carrying out the day as if he hadn’t mopped the floor clean off a crime scene. Then maybe it was slightly threatening.

“This whole fascination about my personal life when concerning a-“ the commander grimaced, “’love interest’. It’s… stressful and so is the sudden camaraderie here, and that’s… something else entirely.” and then some.

“We just barely know you. Just talk to us like those session things, they’re nice. Though… Wow, we really do need those tables, huh?” Michael was joking with him again and the tense moment passed.

“Yes, they are and of course it would take our salary again but we do need a functional food court… and sorry for-” gestures his hand to say this big mess “…all that.”

“Hey, it’s cool. I mean, can’t fault you for it, sir. Stress is stress and Marty always tells me it’s good to talk them out.”

The tension in Peepers body finally relaxed. If he could show up and tell them to never ask about it then they would and he wouldn’t have to deal with ‘it’.

“Did you tell anyone about last night?” Peepers asked to plan out damage control. They need their commander.

“Marty had a feeling you wouldn’t want to share something between you and your date so in the morning he has been telling everyone to not ask. He’s nice like that. Andy’s persistent though… Wait, is this why you’ve been blinking in and out of the ship like a ghost?

I mean- before the whole bug thing- Dan thought someone had put waaaay too much caffeine in your cup and you were moving twice the speed your usual around the ship because of it. Pffftt-“ Michael broke off laughing. “ And- and I thought! It’s totally dumb I swear!” then continued giggling and Peepers at least owe him a little bit so he humors him.

“What, Michael?”

“I thought your date was Wander last night! Hahaha! Oh grop, would you believe the things I come up with?” Michael asked Peepers who might as well be a wall at this point for how he had gone completely rigid.

“… What?”

There was no way, Michael, who volunteers garbage work and eats pizza off the floor, would know.

“I know right? It’s pretty out there but with the whole ‘Wanda’ too similar to ‘Wander’ and travels like Wander and talks like him too. Like, I work odd hours to see Wander on the ship going near your quarters sometimes and I just shrug like duh that’s dumb. I must be imagining things, security had increased and there’s no way.” Michael shrugged like he didn’t just hit the nail in the commander’s coffin.

Commander Peepers was silent and all fury was currently steaming off of him trying to not break again. Michael had noticed the silence and blinked.

“Uhh, sir?”

“You say there was an increase in security?”

“Yes, sir.”

“How many are at sector seven? I haven’t been monitoring the security lately. I hear they’ve been multiplying.”

“Near your room, about five? I think it’s the morale boost that got them to work more. There used to be one watchdog there.”

“Too condensed, I’ll have them spaced out… with the recent incident with the parasites, it would do us better to have an evenly distributed security.”

“Not uh- to be rude or anything but… I’m just a janitor. Why are you telling me this?”

“I need someone to talk to.”

“Sharing session?”

“It’s Wander.”

“WA-!?”

“Don’t. Tell. Anyone. What you think you thought and somehow got it right because so help me…”

“…”

“You told Marty.”

“We are practically married level of friendship, sir.”

“Just- just don’t tell anyone else! I’m on a covert mission.”

“Does it have anything to do with the generator?”

“Again with the generator-! No, it’s- it’s Wander. He is driving me up the wall and all I want is to get rid of him! And a way for me to do that is to trick him into being his friend then back stab him when he least suspects it! I don’t even care if I should trap him for Lord Hater to destroy himself! It’s gone on long enough. I’ll do it myself.”

“By… dating him?”

Peepers sighed, sagging from the exhaustion that finally caught up to him. “That was… a long story that got out of hand…”

Michael snorted, “Sir, isn’t obsessing over Wander like Hater’s thing?”

Peepers groaned as the reality of it hits him. “Don’t get me started, Michael. I’m frustrated as it is… I need information out of him that wasn’t part of the plan. It’s complicated itself into a beast I might be over analysing.”

“What do you mean?”

“I _want_ to talk to him.”

There was a beat of silence before Michael sneezed cutting whatever it was that was serious and Peepers is beginning to form a headache out of the stress he has put himself through. He was also starving and his stomach growled to add this quickly awkward conversation where it’s just the two of them in a dusty room full of generators.

“You going to get some food, sir? I’m sure the entire army is waiting for you.”

“And you?”

“Food is the last thing I want to see after seeing a bug wedge under a… yeah… I’m just gonna clean up dust here. Go talk to them. Go talk to him, maybe? Wander isn’t that bad. I think half us love him actually.”

The commander scowled knowing that indeed a great sum of them do like Wander. He talks to them and knows everyone by name, birthday, favorite color, down to their favorite pair of socks. And the commander was beginning to suspect that they were letting Wander in the ship on purpose and hiding it from him.

Determining the difference from one watchdog to another was difficult to others not their own kind and of course Wander would find it easy. He’s Wander.

 

Leaving Michael to do his work, the commander went up to the food court and everyone was surprised to see him walking at his normal pace.

A watchdog approached him when Peepers got a decent amount of food this time and was eating it from a tray on his lap because there weren’t any tables left. It was Randy and he was part of security.

 

“Hi, sir.” He said tentatively to see if the commander might bolt and Peepers noticed that everyone had stopped what they were doing in the tableless food court to see how he was faring.

“Hi, Randy.” Peepers replied and everyone simultaneously relaxed to have their commander back that also does conversations sometimes. But before Randy could say anything else or before another pair of watchdogs approaching him to talk to him too, Peepers wanted to prove a theory by asking it out loud as casually as he can.

“You all let Wander in the Skullship anytime without informing me, don’t you.” It wasn’t a question and the food court knew it. All silently fearful and Randy, being part of security, was fidgeting.

“Uh-“ he said unintelligently trying to fumble out something that could save him getting blasted at. Oh right, that was what he used to do before all 'this'.

“If Lord Hater doesn’t know it then we don’t have to do anything about it.”

“R-really, sir?”

“Wander causes enough trouble when Hater is involved and so far hasn’t done anything when Hater doesn’t know he is here, correct?”

“Y-yes, sir.”

“So unless he plants a bomb, steals from the ship, causes a plague that would end us all, then I don’t care and Hater will know NOTHING from his visits or all our failures of capturing him, understood?”

“Yes, sir!” And the entire food court saluted and Peepers has now confirmed that it isn’t half if not all of them love the wanderer.

 

And if he does visit again, Peepers wants answers.

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I am so sorry for taking so long. I don't really have a schedule for when i upload and this one doesn't have a drawing in the end but so far I had updated once a week and that was amazing that I was able to do that. I hope this chap was okay, there wasn't much going on and I'm sorry for the wait.

**Author's Note:**

> I wrote this because I wanted to see more of this ship so I thought why not I do it myself? ^^ For the sake of the fic, its set in season 1. Also if I use Michael and Marty a lot, its because they are watchdog ocs me and my friend own. I hope this is okay and please tell me if its a little off, thank you!


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